things I've learned...

Recent things I've learned....
1. I can run 13.4 miles in 3 hours. (Half a marathon BABY!)
2. I can run a half marathon on 4 hours sleep because I'm up all night worried about running flippin 13 miles in the morning
3. Hand sanitizer works as deodorant in a pinch
4 Powdered sugar sprinkled on microwave popcorn is the bomb~

Thats what I've figured out this week.

dinner of champions

Just made hamburger wraps for dinner. I was too hungry and ingested the whole thing. Chased it with some nachos but resisted the screwdriver to wash them nachos down. So...heavy laden with cholesterol I am eyeing my running shorts and they are mocking me. Needless to say I haven't exactly got the athlete diet down yet. Thought about how I read a blog about this runner who ate sprouted wheat sandwiches and drank yard clippings pulverized in a blender. Didn't think about it too long however cause my thoughts clicked over to the idea that sprinkling powdered sugar over popcorn may actually work as a quick fix for kettle corn. Anyway...Enough! I gotta put on my spandex so I can come home, prop my feet up...crochet and watch the blind side...oh and maybe mix up that screwdriver to rehydrate :)

I've been dragging the last couple weeks. I've taken a few too many days off. I run a minimum of 2 days a week but should be running 5. This was reiterated as I tried to complete 12 miles on Monday. Again at mile 6 I was miserable. What is it about mile 6? Always at mile 6 I question my sanity and my body questions its own ability to propel my mass another step. So, luckily we turned around at mile 6 and retreated back the way we came. At mile 8 I started limping and continued that for the remaining 4 miles.

At the parking lot as we stretched I overheard 2 men talking about God. They were bike riders and had passed us a couple times on the trail. By the way... i get so jealous of bike riders. They have a seat! It looks so comfortable, so cushy, so easy...anyhoo. One guy said "I'm not the type to go on a mission trip. It makes me really uncomfortable" The other guy said "Maybe that's just the reason you SHOULD do something like that" There may be some amazing and poignant thought regarding their conversation and it may occur to me later but mostly I was intrigued at how they talked to each other. They were obviously acquaintances and not close friends because they were so nice to each other. They weren't farting or razzing each other and they were very politely talking about their churches and their bible studies. (see sidebar for brilliant segue into kid section) I wanted to stay for a while but my eavesdropping was quickly becoming stalking so I retreated. I don't know why but I'll probably remember mile 12 as my jealousy of Christian cyclists.

Quick sidebar: I asked cadence and mitch what they wanted to be when they grew up. Cadence said a teacher. Mitch replied "A professional slushy eater and farter" They say the coolest things!

I packed up my new found limp and coerced my pissed off hamstrings into the car and drove home. I found my beautiful Christian man waiting for me on the driveway. He had a strange look I couldn't quite place. It was either pity(doubtful), relief (it took me so long to run 12 miles he possibly considered me missing) or curiosity of how I would get out of the car. He cocked his head to the side and gave a half smirk then helped me up the stairs. What a great guy. Maybe he can take up cycling...

SO that was monday. Now its sunday and I'm wondering when the athlete thing kicks in. Cause tonight I don't feel like an athlete. I HAD to run 4 miles tonight and its the LAST thing I wanted. So I said to myself "ITS NOT AN OPTION". That's what I say at 11 at night, and on days after insomnia and on nights like tonight. Because 3 1/2 months from now I have to run a marathon. In retrospect I should have spoken my mantra earlier when I was ingesting onion dip, fajitas, pie and a margarita. Wow, definitely not a pre-run dinner. More like a friday night binge in college. Loaded with worthless nutrients I walked the 4 miles. 1 in the rain and the other 3 on the treadmill. And although tonight I'm going to bed with a belly full of frat boy food... tomorrow I'm waking up an athlete!

Now that you're an athlete...

I was at diva night at a local running store on thursday. I went for the giveaways and free food (and wine). Had a really good time even though I didn't win anything. I was talking to the owner and picking his brain about why I had callouses forming in weird places. If anyone cares my callouses are forming on my metatarsals between the big and 2nd toe. I would expect a callous on my big toe but not between those too. I figured my stride was weird or my shoes were ill fitting. So this nice man and I tried to problem solve it. He said the strangest thing when not being able to answer my medical malady. He said (and not with a hint of sarcasm or wry smile) He said...Well now that you are an athlete you can expect weird aches and pains.

He went on to talk about intensity of work outs and such and I drifted off into this weird world that would ever describe me as an athlete. Excuse me? An athlete is not someone who fears the stores employee may think I'm lost and point out that the weight watchers meeting is the next shopping center over. So I took my athletic mind with me to happy hour with my girlfriends. Over buffalo wings, onion rings, cheese sticks, garlic fries, hummus (a healthy option)and blue cheese chips washed down with 1 or 2 beers I pondered this concept of me an athlete. Don't judge...there were 4 of us and I'd only been labeled an athlete for 15 minutes. Yes...It occured to me that athletes don't eat or drink like this. So for the last 3 days I've asked myself, is this what an athlete would eat? 90 percent of the time the answer is no. So I have room to grow thank goodness.

On a spiritual note I found myself asking God to join me on my long run this weekend. I find it fun to look up scriptures with the chap. and verse being 26.2. Isaiah 26.2 says" Open the gates that the righteous nation may enter..the nation that keeps faith" Psalm 26.2 " Test me oh Lord and try me. Examine my heart and mind. For your love is ever before me and I will walk continually in your truth". Walking continually felt about right. Memorizing scripture was a great diversion and God is a spectacular companion. He showered me with seattle rain at mile 6 and gave me hope at mile 8. I keep thinking that this will get easier...Not quite. But for the first time since starting this journey I actually think that I can do this. You know...now that I'm an athlete and all :)

I have a confession to make. I'm blogging with my pants unsnapped. If this wasn't a family friendly blog you should be worried but don't be. Its because I went on a cruise this week. The food was amazing and i didn't get too crazy. I did get a chance to run 2 and 1/2 times. The 1/2 time was a unsuccessful attempt at the treadmill. Its hard to stay on a moving belt when there are 7-12 foot waves. That accompanied with a sugar coma from being overserved by the pastry chef.
So after a day of rest I tried running on the Lido deck. I was the only one out on the frickin lido deck. Everyone else was on the daquiri deck. But because I was on the daquiri deck the day before...to the Lido deck I went. The sign said 3 times around the ship was a mile. Whats with the fricken math. CANT SOMETHING JUST BE A FRIGGIN MILE! What the sign didn't tell me about the 1 1/2 flights of steps that propelled me onto the 8th deck (balconies and rich people) then back to the Lido (down another flight) to complete a trip around. With 12 laps I was getting desperate, bored and having trouble remembering which lap I was on. So I started a mantra. "Lap 4 only 8 more" "Lap 5 gotta stay alive" "Lap 6, nothing ryhmes with 6" "lap 7 gonna get to heaven" "Lap 8 don't i just feel great" "Lap 9 having a great time" "Lap 10 almost to the end" Laps 11 and 12 were a mixture of explatives (again...not appropriate for a family blog)and praises. With that hour complete I accompanied my very angry achilles tendons to the bar where I met my favorite bartender arthur. Also in cahoots with the pastry chef. This my friends is why I am blogging unsnapped and reclined.
One of my favorite moments was when I called Mitch and was telling him about the big waves that kept me up the night before. He said "did you get your blankets wet?" He is sooo cool. I came home to bethany who had in 5 days mastered 50 new words and my precious Cadence and Mitch that were impressively more brilliant then I had left them. My home also looked amazing. The ubloggable husband had scoured and cleaned the frige and replaced my cracked windshield. Its weird to move the milk carton over and not have it stuck to the shelf with teriyaki sauce. Things just glide over...such a weird concept.
Today I'm kinda going thru cruise withdrawl. When I opened the fridge in my cruise room there was a dobosh torte and fresh ice water. My meals were 5 courses and 5x a day. My room was cleaned twice a day, my covers turned down and chocolate left on my pillow. I had a waiter put my napkin on my lap for me and ordered room service at 130 a.m. What the cruise didn't have however, was gorgeous, sticky-fingered children; Husbands who roll their eyes at you, dogs who roll in poop and elastic pants. So goodbye to my wait staff, pastry chef and bartender and hello to my life. (pictures to arrive when I can figure it out)

just a little chubby

I was feeling lighter, for the first time in a long time. Maybe its because i had a spring in my step...aka a limp...after completing 8.5 miles. It was so cool. 8.5 miles. REALLY. 2 hours later I felt quite the accomplishment. At about mile 6 I was praying that my watch was incorrect and we were nearing our destination. I was wrong. It was a little past nausea and right around the corner from a close call at losing bowel control. There it was...the end and once I reached it I just crawled in my car and headed home. Snacking on pretzel thins which is an oxymoron because it is a snack that does not make you thin. Which segues me into my next topic. Thin.
On tues a patient told me I looked thinner. I was so elated as I was hoping some of this running had paid off. My elation decreased a little when I pointed out to myself that she was 86 years old and had glaucoma. So if anyone is keeping track I have now been complimented by the handicapped and blind. I'll take it. The kicker is a comment my sweet 5 year old said this evening. He had decided to propel himself over my prone body as I lay on the living room floor. Exasperated after making the jump he proclaimed. "Since you are a just little bit chubby it was harder than I though to make that jump". Oh...from the mouths of babes.

7.2 then the couch

I've been reading the jeff galloways book "marathon, you can do it!" and in it they recommend taking the day off before a long run. Problem was yesterday had been my 3rd day off in a row. So figuring that was too many i took a hot bath at 1030 pm and hit the treadmill at 1045. I don't know why I insist on running clean I just do. Which is ironic because its washington and always raining and thus the minute i step outside...i'm clean. Anyhoo...freshly bathed i made it 45 minutes on the treadmill. Now 1130 pm I finished watching Iron chef america (also weird that I watch cooking shows while running) while pretending to stretch...and of course eating because the show made me hungry.

So that put me to bed after midnight and at 7am I briefly remember cadence asking if she could serve the kids cocoa puffs, toast and cheezits. I remember thinking how great it was that her breakfast contained the 4 basic food groups: salt, transfats, high fructose corn syrup and artificial colors. I drifted in and out of consciousness and woke up to an empty bag of cheezits and the dog covered in orange crumbs. Good to know the lab is carbo loading. I also heard mitch holler "Coda peed on the chair". In my fuege dream state I wondered how a 70 pound dog could get on a rocker but didn't really care.

Finally, after church I embarked upon the trail with my running partner in tow (actually she was towing me) and with my excellent math skills figured 9 laps around the lake was my goal. About lap 7 i started to really feel the sleep deprivation and late night treadmill affair. I realized that trix wasn't the breakfast of champions and you can't cram for a long run by trying to make up the mileage the night before. With my newfound wisdom I completed 7.2 miles in 1 hour and 40 minutes. I also found a 20 dollar bill on the ground. Perfectly crisp and waiting for me. I was looking for an owner but there were no other idiots running in the rain so i was the rightful new owner. I have justified that it was dropped from heaven like Jesus dangling a carrot to help me reach my goal. It will fuel my latte's for a week and for that I am grateful. Jason told cadence I was running a marathon. I cringed as it is only 5 hours more than I did today. She didn't seem very impressed till I told her "today I ran as far as from our house to the church. Her beautiful brown eyes got big and mine did as well...because...in my eyes and in my 6 year olds...it really is pretty cool.